נשאת ונתת באמונה
One of my father’s many fine character traits was that he was very particular about recognizing, acknowledging and showing appreciation to people for even their efforts or gestures, large or small.
I am truly humbled by the outpouring of love and support I have received from so many of you. May G-d Almighty repay you for your kindness and compassion with abundant blessings and Simcha in every area of life.
I’m sharing with you an adapted version of the eulogy I delivered at my father’s funeral on Thursday, attended by many hundreds of local community members. Enroute to the cemetery, the Aron (coffin) passed by the Chabad educational institutions to which he was so dedicated, giving the students the opportunity to pay their respects. (see pics)
As I wrote in my previous email, I learned of my father’s passing shortly after singing “Baruch Habo” the traditional “welcome” - that begins a Chuppah ceremony. Upon some imaginative reflection, it occurred to me that perhaps as I was singing Baruch Habo under the sky, I was echoing a symphony of voices in Heaven welcoming my father’s soul, with “Baruch Habo” - welcome to heaven.
The first greeter is the Malach Michoel the Angel of Kindness: “thank you for the abundant kindness, compassion, empathy and generosity you brought to the world. Baruch Habo.”
The next greeter is the Malach Gavriel the Angel of Strength and Discipline: “Thank you for your strong and uncompromising commitment to Jewish life, to your honesty, integrity and authenticity, to your deeply anchored values and principles. We so admired your tenacity, like the way you mustered the strength in your advanced age to walk to the front of the shul to hear the Chazzan and be able to answer a Barchu, a Kedusha, an Amen Yehei Shmei Rabo. The Alter Rebbe was so right when he said that we the Malachim (angels) would give anything in the world for one Amen Yehei Shmei Rabo. Reb Mendel thank you for lighting up the heavens and giving us a taste of what a real Amen Yehei Shmei Rabo feels like. Baruch Habo.”
My father and his brothers were the first generation of his family born in Australia - the transitional generation from the Alter Heim (old home of Eastern Europe) to the New world. The future of Yiddishkeit (Jewish life) was in the balance. Could it survive in the modern, western world?
“Baruch Habo tayere (dear) Mendele” say his parents Zeide Srulik and Bobbe Rivtche - “thank you for being such a strong and stellar steward of our sacred Mesorah (tradition) for bringing the Alter Heim (old home) to the Nayer Shtub (new house).
Every weekday morning before my father left to work, my mother would make his tie with her signature Windsor knot - a double knot that Halacha (Jewish law) treats as a Kesher Shel Kayomo - an everlasting (knot) bond. With glowing radiance emanating from my mother’s Neshome, she now says to her beloved Mendel; “For seventy years we bonded in the world below, now we will enjoy our Kesher Shel Kayama eternally together in the world above. Baruch Habo my dear.”
Shomayim (Heaven) can be a pretty difficult place to navigate, there’s ‘Haicholois’ and ‘Nesivois’, portals and pathways galore. But my father need not fear ever getting lost, as my brother Chaim calls out and says “Baruch Habo Dad!” Let me show you around!”
Long before GPS technology, Chaim had this ability to arrive in a city he had never been to before and know exactly how to get around. And now my father’s right hand man is right there by his side again.
As they stroll the hallways of heaven, voices call out: “Mr. New, Mr. New! Remember me? I was a customer of yours who rediscovered Yiddiskeit through doing business with you. Thank you and Baruch Habo!”
“How about me?” cries out a woman who had been a lonely widow for many years. “I was a guest at your Shabbos table and you and your wife made me feel like a queen. I am forever grateful to you, Baruch Habo!”
“I could never afford the tuition for my kids at Yeshiva," says another, “but you made sure I was never turned away. You ensured that my children received a proper Jewish education! Baruch Habo!”
“And my family couldn’t afford a place for me in the Montefiore Home for the Aged, and you made sure I too was not turned away, that I could live out my years in safety and dignity. Baruch Habo!”
“I needed a loan for a down payment on my first house, and I didn’t qualify for a bank loan. Thanks to your loan I was able to provide a home for my family. You put me on my feet! Thank you and Baruch Habo!”
Chaim turns to my father and says: “Dad, this is starting to feel like your daily walk on Carlisle street - everybody knows you here!”
One of the most sacred areas of Heaven is the Mesivta D’rakia - the Heavenly House of learning. Chaim shows my father in, and there’s Uncle Louis listening to a shiur (class) in the Kollel section, when he looks up and sees his brother and says “my learning has never been the same without you. Baruch Habo, dear brother!” And so these two brothers, best of friends and Chavrusas (learning partners) begin to learn together where they left off about a year and half ago, pausing only when they hear a sweet and familiar melodic voice begin Ashrei. It’s unmistakably their elder brother Meyer’s voice. The brothers are together again.
Suddenly, there’s a buzz reverberating all over Heaven and Neshomas (souls) and Malochim (angels) are frantically headed in the same direction. “Come on Dad,” says Chaim. “Looks like there’s a surprise Farbrengen about to begin.” The Heichal (hall) is packed; unphased, Chaim seats my father right at the top end of the table near the Rebbe’s.
Uncle Shmilik has just struck up a Nikolayevdiker niggun (chassidic melody) as he sits alongside my grandfather (his brother-in-law) Zeide Isser who says “Baruch Habo Mein Tayere Eidim.” (welcome my dear son in law). “Remember when you got engaged, that I insisted you say a Maamer Chassidus (Chassidic discourse) at your Kabolas Ponim (groom’s reception) and you had no idea what I was talking about? It will all become clear to you now. You're about to understand a Chassidic discourse like never before.”
After the delivering the Maamer, The Rebbe motions to my father to come up to him, pours him a big cup of wine and with a big smile says “L’chaim V’lovrocho - a groisen yasher koach (a big thank you) for everything you did for my Moisdois (institutions) in Melbourne - the Yeshiva and Bais Rivka, bguf (physically) b’mammoin (financially) u’beneshome. (spiritually) Baruch Habo Reb Mendel!”
The Farbrengen is over and Rabbi Groner who led the Chabad institutions in Melbourne for over fifty years, makes his way over to my father and says, “Mendel! Mir Hoben Geakert un Geziet un Geboit, we tilled, we planted, we built. The Rebbe blaibt nisht kein bal chov. The Rebbe will see to it that whatever we started will continue to flourish and grow. Baruch Habo!”
The Talmud records that there are four questions one is asked by the Beis Din Shel Mal0 - the Heavenly Court. There was no need to ask my father, so instead the court didn’t ask them as questions, but declared them as statements:
Your business dealings were with honesty and integrity
קבעת עתים לתורה
You set aside time to learn Torah
עסקת בפרי׳ ורבי׳
You built a beautiful family
צפית לישועה
You prayed for redemption
ברוך הבא מנחם מענדל בן ישראל!
Welcome to Heaven, Menachem Mendel ben Yisroel!
May his life inspire us all to live life a little better, a little higher, a little humbler, a little deeper, a little kinder, a little nicer, a little more generous, a little more committed, a little more active, a little more connected.
Good Shabbos and Shabbat Shalom, with love from Down Under,
Rabbi Ruvi New
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